train, pray, and the game face

69 days to go!
Well, it has been kind of an off week. I got sick for like three days, which totally threw my training off balance. The mileage is starting to add up, but not overwhelmingly. Although my Sunday ride was disastrous. Just when I thought, “damn, I’m feeling stronger, I’m kicking ass!” I woke up with a stiff back, so I was concerned whether or not this was one of those symptoms before my disc goes completely to shit, and then I thought I was doing 5 hrs, 19 mph. Instead, they went MUCH faster and only 4 hrs. I don’t expect to have anybody babysitting me, much less when we ride, and I also know my limitations, but if I knew that, I would’ve done something different. I know when to push myself, and when to sit it down. I wasn’t feeling well enough to attempt to haul ass for that amount of time after not training due to a nasty cold. So my friend stayed behind with me (thx Kike!). I don’t mind staying behind, but I didn’t feel safe riding Biscayne Blvd. Needless to say, I have no desire in EVER riding to Hollywood again! The roads are ridiculously bumpy, there’s much less respect for the cyclist, I don’t know, I was just plain pissed the whole way!!
So I don’t think the disc is getting better at all. It frustrates me, because here I am, twice a day, stretching like crazy and nothing feels different, at all! Every day, I get up in the morning and the tingling sensation says to me “yep, I’m still here!” I sit, it tingles, I get up it tingles, I sit too long, you guessed it. I obligate myself to get up often during the day, so by 6pm I don’t get that pain that is just plain annoying, from the hamstring to the side calf. I cant even go to visit my friends up north without having to stop the car about 4-5 times to walk it off.
I’m still going to the acupuncturist; I’d like to think is helping somehow, that maybe after a couple of visits it will fully heal, but really, no difference. So I do yoga, I stretch, acupuncture, I did special anti inflammatories (Aleve works better, can you believe it?), hell, I even did a damn epidural that did not even tickle the damn hernia, and the bitches charged me over $300, so let’s add insult to injury, literally! I’m just not too positive today. I’m just a little sick and tired of this feeling. I cry sometimes because I don’t know what else to do, then I remember those who are impaired or injured and can’t do any, or any of the 6 people in my life who are battling cancer and chemo is kicking their ass, so I feel sad. Then I get mad because I can’t even bitch about it not even for a second without someone telling me how half full my glass is and how I should remember unfortunate others are.! Coño, we need to let it out sometimes!! So there, I’m done with the bitchin, back to my glass full life.
Back to my training so I get stronger, to my praying so my disc gets better every day, and to my “Bring it on Bitches!” attitude, God knows I need it. Man, I'm in such a dire need of good news....